Fri. Jan. 5/95
Well, today I got a lab guide for dissecting the fish. Oh, I can hardly wait to slit its belly open.
I endured French, suffered endless agonies through math, and went to have my photo taken. The photographer had packed up after 20 min, so I didn't get a re-take. I then ate lunch, was bored stiff in Italian, and laughed a lot in Geography. (Daniel is so funny!)
Yesterday I had an in-depth conversation with Cara. It was about The Jerk. It makes no sense for me to like him: we're absolutely incompatible. He's.... a jerk, I guess. Pushy. Sulky. Domineering. But cute and sweet sometimes. Help. Please, please. If anyone out there knows a good shrink, give me a call. I'm losing my mind over this guy, and Cara and Marlowe can tell we're not compatible. Hell, so can my YM magazine. And I can't understand why I like him so much. The Holy Grail Syndrome? Maybe. Maybe I should've never said no to fooling around with him, but then, I wasn't ready for that. I'm not sure what I'm ready for. I'll admit it, here: when we were kissing, I was scared. I know, I know it sounds stupid, but I was really afraid that we'd wind up doing more than necessary, or that I'd wind up in an unfavourable, compromising position.
Cara thinks it's because I'm sexually attached to him. (Figuratively, here. NOT literally.) But we didn't have sex or anything. So I dunno. But I wonder what if I did make out with him again and fool around. Anyways, I've got to get over it. It'll be easier if I just get over it. Move on, and let go.
I was supposed to sleep over at Cara's tonight, but she went babysitting and didn't call. Needless to say, I'm slightly ticked. Np. I'm tired from my stressful day.
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